I have been wasting way too much time brooding in the last few days. I have been contemplating why I feel so lonely and shitty but I just keep thinking myself in circles. I've started wondering about my emotions on the super micro level in my brain. What the hell goes on in there? I feel the pang of some crappy feeling...does some chemical osmose somewhere? Cell wall something something? Zoom out to someone saying something mean to me. Still far too much existential contemplation. I get into a deep hole with my doom and gloom thought processes; every night my thoughts dig all the way to China.
i know you all atheist and whatever, but don't think of it as a religion. cause when you talk about it-you know, enlightenment or fight club. then you broke the rule already.
ReplyDeletealmost all of it is language. thought projections. control your mind my dear kk. don't live the past or project the future. bring yourself to center. put your thoughts on your thoughts. think about that you're thinking. realize that your thoughts and the feelings they bring come and go. you can't really make your thoughts stick in your head forever cause sometimes, you need to think that you need to pee. and that's okay too.
realize that you are not a snowflake. i am not a unique snowflake too. everyone's the same. people get sad... and we're all trying to be happy. we are all the same crap... or something like that. i feel your pain. maybe you should run so you can release some endorphins and you can be a walking orgasm like i'm trying to be.
fb me your address. fight club zen.